Re-Inspired to stick around for a while longer!

So, for a while there I was feeling quite down in the dumps (as can be seen in my previous blog). Its not just about the weight loss (or lack thereof) but there was a lot going on in my life, a lot of stresses. Dieting (or eating healthy or whatever you want to call it) was no on my list of priorities. In fact, it was the cause of anxiety. I wasn't eating well, which was causing what I call the "dieters guilt", which of course resulted in more binging.

I was on the verge of quitting, but wanted to take me time to ensure I was definitely making the right choice. My thoughts floated to my darker moments, crying before nights out (or in the morning before work), embarrassment when I couldn't get that dress on (or off) in the changing rooms despite being a size up, the shame as I stood on another set of scales and realised that this was the heaviest I have ever been.

My first thought was - its obvious, the plans don't work - if they did you wouldn't be returning for the 14th time since you were 20!! However, I have seen for myself proof that the plans do work. The reason they are different isn't because of their science its because of us, people, who are different - its all in the head. I have invested time, emotions and a shed load of money into a variety of slimming clubs and every time I come away I rejoin a year or two later: dejected, rejected and sad.

2 things have happened in the last few weeks that have shifted my perspective once more. First of all there is a glimmer of hope on the love life front. Its very early doors (I haven't even changed my facebook status yet!) but one thing that is clear already is he is very attracted to me. I know this, because he tells me. Yet, almost as soon as the words are out I can feel myself disagreeing, arguing, disbelieving. This is neither attractive nor the good foundation of a relationship! Its not fair on me (or him) for me to let doubt creep in after a few dates.

More significantly I have organised a girlie beach holiday!!! YAY!!! October 2012 - me and 3 of my bestest are hitting a far off sun soaked land with LOADS of alcohol! I refuse to let another holiday be ruined when perusing the pictures after and thinking if only, i wish, why didn't i do something about myself when I had the time... etc etc!

So, the Wii comes out tonight, what ever it says we go with and tracking starts tomorrow! Here's to inspiration, and GOAL!!!